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Thank you God! Today’s worship was so good. In the beginning as I was worshipping right in front of the altar at YA service. During the praise songs I felt quite weird because there was no one beside me clapping along with me. I felt like everyone was far apart and could not really feel the unity of worshipping together as one whole body.

When the worship songs came, I felt very sad and my heart was so broken. That was when I told you that my desire would be to bring my friends to church and to worship alongside me. How great that would be! To have my beloved friends worshipping you with me. At that point I really felt like the next moment I would see them all around me. In my brokenness you caused a stirring within me and I felt your fire consume me. I haven’t felt this empowering outpour of your fire and annointing on me for quite a long time already. Today when I encountered you in worship, it was so indescribable. How I hoped worship didnt have to end then.

Dear Father, I love you. Thank you for the burden you place in me for the lost souls. Thank you so much. I can’t thank you enough Lord. My prayer is that one day I will be able to minister to the poor and lead them to you. Thank you for giving me such a burden and love for the poor. That is where my true satisfaction comes from, to see the poor rejoice in you knowing that there is no lack in your grace and blessings. This I commit to you Lord. Amen!

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on August 30th, 2008 | No Comments »

Just came home from sending Joseph off on his flight to US. Writing this, I do feel a bit sad. For the past 3 years of my life, I have been meeting up with Joseph every week for accountability. I remember the times when we would meet at church, sing praises to God, being completely transparent before each other with our struggles and weaknesses, sharing our lives with each other. Those were the times I learned the importance of fellowship and walking alongside with a brother and not as a lone ranger.

God I pray that your blessing will go with him as he spends the next 4 years sutdying at US. I ask of you Lord that you would keep him from evil and temptations, that his desires will be attuned to yours. May he never leave you or forsake you or fall to the wayward path as he journeys on in life. Let it be a fruitful, trying yet a journey that would always bring him on his knees to you in a humble and contrite spirit. Go with him my Lord, this I pray. In Jesus name, Amen!

My Lord, in the quietness there is only you and me. I love you Father, may I grow to become like Jesus. For the human heart is selfish, but your grace and love is ever so freely given without any hesitation. I want that Lord, to be a giver and a reflector of your love to the people that are in need of you. All this I commit myself to you. Amen.

PR: wait…  I: wait…  L: wait…  LD: wait…  I: wait… wait…  I: wait…  L: wait…  C: wait…  SD: wait…

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on August 13th, 2008 | No Comments »

Thank you Lord for the refreshing time with you earlier. Indeed too much work and less time with you offsets the balance of Christian living. In the past few days, I was super energetic and passionate in preparing to set up my company. It was so exciting and I felt at times I could work through the night forgoing my sleep thankfully I din do that due to school and health.

When I was so engrossed with my work, sometimes I spend lesser time with you. Lord I want you to be part of all that I am doing simply the center of it all. Just last night I suddenly had this very depressing feeling of being all alone in my business venture. Maybe it’s because I am still trying to build up my core team and feel like there’s so much in this world that I have to face and it aren’t as easy as it seems especially when meeting up with clients etc. But I think most part of it came from not being able to feel your presence with me on this venture.

At times I am in such a dilemma over which path I should really take on. I am so passionate about doing SEO business and starting my own company. Yet at times the image of your calling of my life keeps coming back to me. I know what I must do to fulfill your calling for my life. God show my thy word and a heart that obeys the truth.

I just want you to be a part of me, sometimes it can be really frightening when you take the helm and all of me. Between my interest and your interest. I believe Lord that you place in me the interest and ability to do business. That I should use the talents that you have give me. Yet at the same time I feel by really giving you my all and letting you take charge which at times might steer me away from doing what I like, that’s when I would be fulfilling all that you created me to be. Help me Lord, that as your Spirit moulds me to become more like Jesus, that I would surrender every part of me to you. Thank you Lord.

“What good is it if a man gains the whole world but yet loses his own soul in the process.” - Matthew 16:26

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on July 18th, 2008 | No Comments »

Throughout the past few months of my life, I have been living a life that had all my needs well taken care of. Not to say that it wasn’t the case all these years. Indeed God has provided and cared for me well all along. But in the last 8 months with my Internet Career taking off, I have had the luxury of spending on good food often without having to worry about the cost.

There were times I thought of driving a convertible and how good it would be..ironically those thoughts depresses me. I came to a point of my life where I felt making money can be so meaningless at times. Especially when I was making more than excess of what my needs demanded. I realized that without a purpose of what to do with money, it is meaningless making them.

All these while doing business, my perceived value of money changed drastically. Millions were no longer big in my eyes. I know that if I put my soul on the line chasing after money, those figures aren’t hard to achieve. But what is the purpose of it all?

My heart breaks for the poor who are facing hunger everyday. I feel that way even as I write. At times I felt happier with the thought just having enough to live by daily. I wouldn’t mind that simple lifestyle. Being wealthy brings about a truck load of responsibilities especially when one is a child of God. After reading about Rick Warren’s news about his wife getting cancer and the millions that his book sales brought in, he was burdened with the responsibility on how he is going to use that money.

I figured that if I were to use my money to buy luxurious items, it would just bring me deeper into the pit of emptiness. I have once again come to the conclusion that unless and unless I do what God specifically calls me to do, apart from that everything else is meaningless. Sometimes the allure of success in business can be strong and at times ministering to people in the business world might seem like a way of glorifying God. But I don’t think that’s what exactly God wants me to do in life. I am confident that God has much better plans, a purpose for my life that would far glorify him more than me trying to find a way and squeeze ministry in it.

Lord, you have all of me. I don’t want my way. I want yours. For it is only yours, that can truly bring me the utmost satisfaction that I can ever find.

Not my will. But yours be done, Lord.

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on July 6th, 2008 | No Comments »

Today was quite depressing for me. I did not do too well for my Data Structure and Algorithms paper today. Everything seemed so meaningless to me today. Even the work that I do online.

Amidst all these emptiness, I thank you Lord for your comfort. It is only through you that I can find full satisfaction. Simply waiting before my Lord and lingering in your tangible presence comforts my heart to know that you are here with me. Words can’t fully express my gratitude Lord. Once again I have come to the realization that anything I do outside the will of God is meaningless. Help me to stay focus and in your will Lord. Amen!

“Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.” - James 4:8a

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on June 23rd, 2008 | No Comments »

Last night my family and I went out for dinner to celebrate Father’s Day. It was a sumptuous dinner along Bukit Timah Road and I gave my family a treat What really warmed my heart was when my Dad said thank you to me in Cantonese after that. Now I can’t remember when was the last time I heard it, normally it’s just an acknowledgment but last night it was the words thank you. That really meant a lot to me. Thank you Lord, I pray that my relationship with my parents will get better and better as time goes by.

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on June 16th, 2008 | 2 Comments »

Just came back from Retreat today Lord!

The past 5 days of my life flew pass as though 50 years have passed.

I have got a lot of things to say but I dont know how I should write them out. Blogging alone takes a lot out of me as it requires commitment for me to write. But Lord coming back to the initial purpose of setting this blog up was so that I can record my life journey and see how the Lord has led me through all these years faithfully.
Throughout this retreat we played a game called Lifegame which led us to run through our whole lives in this game till the day we all die. We started out at the age of 15 and every hour was 5 years of aging. In this game, we had to grow up into the working world, marriage life, kids, and die eventually.

Here goes what I have learnt in this retreat.

1) Life is really so short, money is needed for survival but making so much money with no godly purposes to use the money leads to a very deep emptiness within me.

2) Investing in God’s kingdom brings much joy to my heart. Know what you are investing today! Does it have eternal value..

For the past 1 year my spiritual life has been on a decline. Today was one of the times when I came back to God and sought after him with all that I am.  I really want to grow and become more and more like Christ each day. This time, I dont wanna mature in Christ alone, I wanna grow together with all my beloved brothers and sisters in Christ.

Right now I am feeling quite empty and sad actually. Maybe its because I miss the people at retreat.  But more less I felt life to be so meaningless after playing the game. Lots of things that I am doing and have now does not hold eternal value at all.

I need a restructure in my entire being and life, a renewed purpose and vision Lord. I want to be a giver and not a taker. Business has caused me to be selfish with my time and service to you. I wanna tell you this Lord before I go to bed. I pray that I will be faithful and committed to you in my daily life, having spiritual disciplines in praying and reading the Word as it is my breath and food of life. Lead me O Lord, guide me and mould me into the person you very much want me to become. Not my will, but yours be done. Amen.

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on June 13th, 2008 | No Comments »

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on May 20th, 2008 | Enter your password to view comments

Maybe cos I am tired right now.. Disarray..

I seem to be losing my grip.. I am physically tired now.. I need to have a fresh touch of your best and plan for me Lord. I don’t wanna just live my own way anymore..I want your way Lord. I really do.

These few days I have been listening to Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis and I found a guy’s version Alejandro Manzano too. I love the way she sang it. These days there are times I thought of having a girlfriend. I think about the times when I could spend time with that special person alone. Truth be told, there’s no one yet. And I don’t see anyone whom I might be interested in. Gah your ways Lord are higher than my ways. To you I commit. Amen!

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on April 28th, 2008 | No Comments »

Time vanishes! 9 weeks of holidays has just passed. I must say I am pretty glad with how I spent my time this holiday. This whole holidays has been packed with meeting up with people (ministry), family, meeting with clients, working on my online ventures which seems fun to me. Very organized and time well spent. I like

Had an enjoyable and fruitful time today discussing and studying the Word together with Kenneth. Was touching on the lesson of prayer and I am glad Kenneth was able to understand and absorbed the lesson well

School is reopening next week. With that I still have lots of online work not completed yet. There’s so much energy and excitement in doing online stuff. I am currently branching into Affiliate Marketing. I thank you Lord for making this journey a trying but enjoyable one. I aim to score well for all my modules this coming semester and to learn how to balance even better with this extra time!

Am off to pick up some products to promote..

Filed under: Daily Thoughts on April 11th, 2008 | No Comments »